Cover Wars
I have a wife and two dogs. We all sleep together. Well, in the same room. Each dog has their own bed. Virginia and I “sleep” in a queen-size bed with queen-size sheets and queen-size blankets. Virginia has suffered from “hot flashes” for years. They wake her up and she sighs and throws off the covers. In the morning, Max, the larger of the two dogs, jumps on our bed and pins the covers wherever they were last thrown. The pouncing of the dog wakes Virginia up and then she blames me for hogging the covers. She calls me ratchetman and claims that every time I move, I ratchet the covers to my side of the bed.
That is a plausible explanation which I have not been able to totally refute. There is a possibility however slight, that her hypothesis is correct; especially since she bought the Chilly-Pad. The Chilly-Pad is a marvelous invention for those who tend to sleep “hot”. I receive no commissions (hint, hint Chilly-Pad maker), but this is a sleep-saving and possibly marriage-saving pad that circulates water at whatever temperature you set it. It works like a miracle and drastically reduces the late-night hot flashes. However, it didn’t entirely solve the cover wars. Hence, lending more credibility to Virginia’s hypothesis.
Last night, the comforter was almost entirely on my side of the bed, even so far as to be slightly accordioned on the floor beside me. I was sleeping comfortably and soundly when all of a sudden there was a mighty tug and the comforter flew into the air and landed unceremoniously on her side of the bed. There were comments made but I was too sleepy to pay much attention. All I knew was that there was a mighty whoosh as the covers came flying off me and landed ever so gently and softly on her side of the bed. I had a partial sheet covering. The whoosh of the comforter and the unsportsman like comments that accompanied the whooshing must have woken up Max who stretched, sneezed and pounced on the bed pinning the covers so as to leave me shivering in the cold early morning air. I think we need bigger blankets.
Husbandry 