“Love recognizes no barriers.” – Maya Angelou. “There is no charm equal to tenderness of heart.” – Jane Austen. “The heart has its reasons which reason knows nothing.” – Blaise Pascal. “You can’t blame gravity for falling in love.” – Albert Einstein
There is no shortage of quotes about love. The quotes cited above are ones that seem true for me. So, here is what I have learned about love these past 72 years of life. I suspect there is more that I’m not telling you, but this is what’s on my mind this morning. First, this is a beautiful morning. The sun is shining, the birds are chirping, the sky is clear, I just got back from a magnificent bike ride through one of our lovely parks, and there is an asshole with the noisiest damn leaf blower in the world that has been blasting away for the last two fucking hours.
After writing that last sentence, I hope my grandkids don’t read my blog. Because I love them and I want them to properly idolize me. Which they do. That’s the purpose of grandparents – to provide role models for youth to emulate. Parenting is hard. I know of few parents who haven’t partially ruined their darling children. Because parenting is a learn as you go kind of thing. It is trial and error. I don’t care how many books you read on child rearing, your kid is different and doesn’t follow the guidelines laid out in the books, so you are on your own to try to figure it out. And, you will screw it up. I know I did. I think you will too. If you want to be a perfect parent, get a dog instead of a kid. Their love is pretty much unconditional.
But even though you will make mistakes, your kids learn to love from you. Give them love and they will learn to love others. And society will be a better place. That’s it. The secret to life and to a better society. More love. God knows this world needs a lot more of it. So, just love your kids. They don’t have to be as smart or as good of an athlete or as talented as some other kid you know. Parenting is not a competition. It is not a win-lose kind of deal. Your child is not an extension of yourself. Let it go. Let them be who they are. And just love them. That’s it. It’s not that hard. If you teach them to love, all the other values will follow. Love is the center of it all. Everything moral derives from love.
Love is additive. Love for one person doesn’t diminish the love for another. It’s just more love. The more people we love, the more love we have. The more love we give, the more love we get. It is really quite amazing! And it doesn’t come with conditions. It just is.
Love is unbounded. It is not constrained. It is not packaged. It is not a commodity. It is free flowing. You can’t grab on to it and hang on. It is like this morning’s summer breeze. It is warm and all encompassing. You can’t just keep it for yourself. It doesn’t belong to you.
The family (whatever you conceive that to be) ensures the continuity of love. Parents love each other and that love is passed to their children. Because they are loved, they have love to give.
While love has no barriers, you can feel it and see it in the faces of those around you. It wraps you in a warm cloak and makes you feel safe.
Love is totally without reason. There is no science to love. It is not a mathematical equation. It is completely unreasonable. You can’t “make” it happen. The closest thing to a rational explanation of love is that “it is”. It exists. I know it. You know it. But it is ephemeral. Not in the sense that it is fleeting. It is not. It is forever. But in the sense that you can’t just grab it. Like Einstein said, “you can’t blame gravity.”
I think that is all I have to say today.
Husbandry 